ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
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