She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
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