that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
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