while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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