I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
