If that was your dad, he is hot
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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