There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
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