No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
