You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize