Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I think I sprained my soul last night
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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