stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
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