i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
