I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize