If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
