Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Randomize
