what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Randomize
