I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Randomize
