Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
