just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
