yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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