your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Randomize