Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
