I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
