I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
