Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
