Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize
