If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Randomize
