I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Randomize
