You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
