How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
