i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
