It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Randomize
