Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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