its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize
