fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
