You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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