I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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