I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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