Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
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