My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
Randomize
