Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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