he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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