HIV tests are more positive than that guy
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
She's the barista slut.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
Fuck me I smell like cheese
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
