the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
you win again, gameday.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
