I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
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