matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Randomize
