Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Randomize
