on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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