he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize
