she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
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