Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Randomize
