i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
