Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
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