I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
